I’ll Never Parent the Same Way After This Pandemic Is Over

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IDGAF about the chores anymore.

My house is a nonstop mess now, and I have stopped caring. In the days before Covid, I spent my days trying (and usually failing) to keep my house orderly. But that old truism that kids can destroy a home faster than a mom can clean is accurate. Still, I always tried to clean like the Queen was coming. That was a piece of advice someone once gave me — clean like you’re expecting important company and you’ll always have a lovely house.

I quit trying to control my kids’ schedules and lives.

My kids are homeschooling now because the local public schools are not safe. Until everyone here is vaccinated and the threat of Covid is not enough to shut down my town, we’re not leaving home. That said, I don’t have to put the pressure on myself to emulate school routines as I did in the beginning. My kids, I have discovered through trial and error, do their best work in mid-morning. They don’t want me hand-holding them through their assignments. Instead, I give them their pile of work for the day, and they do it when it is least frustrating for them.

My idea of what self-care is has dramatically changed.

I used to fully buy into the idea that self-care and spa days were the same thing. Now, to be clear, my spa days took place in my bathroom with a glass of wine, a face mask, and a hot bubble bath.

Talking is the crucial life-line in our home.

My kids sometimes hate this, but I talk. A lot. I ask everyone in this house how they feel, what they are thinking. Our family has evolved in the past year to place a significant priority on emotional and mental health. If one of us isn’t doing well, then none of us are.

I’ll never go back.

I was never the perfect mom, but I had tried to be so many times that the failures eroded my self-esteem. I was martyring myself and didn’t realize it until we were all trapped in our house with nowhere to go for restless stretches of time.

Parenting, Science, and History Essay Hustler | Book Writer | Rabid Reader | Rep’d by Folio Literary Management | Follow me on Twitter, FB, IG @housewifeplus

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